10 Life Lessons of Jesus Christ – Forgiveness

Harshala Emmanuel - 17 March 2022

I have come across the lives of some unusual, extraordinary, and inspiring people. One of them is Gladys Staines. On 23rd January 1999, in a small village called Keonjhar, in Orissa State, India, 58-year-old Graham Stuart Staines, an Australian Christian missionary, along with his two sons, Philip (aged 10) and Timothy (aged 6), was burnt to death by members of a Hindu fundamentalist group named Bajrang Dal. After the sentencing of the accused, his wife Gladys issued a statement saying that she had forgiven the killers and had no bitterness towards them. She and her daughter Esther continued to live and work in India caring for those who were poor and were affected by leprosy until she returned home to her native country of Australia in 2004.

Another example is Corrie ten Boom (15 April 1892 – 15 April 1983) a Dutch watchmaker and who worked with her father, Casper ten Boom, her sister Betsie ten Boom and other family members to help many Jewish people escape from the Nazis during the Holocaust in World War II by hiding them in her home. She believed her family carried out the actions by following the will of God. They were caught, and she was arrested and sent to the Ravensbrück concentration camp.

Her most famous book, The Hiding Place, is a biography that recounts the story of her family's efforts and how she found and shared hope in God while she was imprisoned at the concentration camp. She went through many hard trials and her efforts of converting others along the way has helped many lives. After the war, Ten Boom returned to the Netherlands to set up a rehabilitation centre in Bloemendaal. She returned to Germany in 1946 and met with and forgave two Germans who had been employed at Ravensbrück, one of whom had been particularly cruel to her sister Betsie. Ten Boom went on to travel the world as a public speaker and writer, visiting more than 60 countries. Her key messages were on forgiveness, hope, love, and salvation through the saving grace of Jesus Christ.

How did these ordinary people become extraordinary by forgiving their offenders? Why did they pardon them?

At this time, I want to draw your attention to a few Biblical heroes.

• Joseph, the Dreamer – In Genesis 37, Joseph forgave his brothers who hated him because of their father Jacob’s love for Joseph, so much that they even tried to kill him.

• Jesus forgave the very people, namely the Romans, and Jews responsible for falsely accusing him resulting in his crucifixion. Luke 23:34 (KJV) Then said Jesus, “Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do”. And they parted his raiment and cast lots.

• Stephen forgave the people who stoned him. Acts 7:57-60 (NLT) as they stoned him, Stephen prayed, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit”. He fell to his knees, shouting, “Lord, don’t charge them with this sin!” And with that, he died.

• Even Apostle Paul found that his disciples abandoned him at his time of need; yet he pardons them, without holding any grudges against them. Timothy 4:16 (NLT) “The first time I was brought before the judge, no one came with me. Everyone abandoned me. May it not be counted against them.”

You must have guessed what our topic tonight is all about – it’s forgiveness.

Key Bible passage: Matthew 6:12 & 14-15 (NIV) “And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins”.

Background or Context:

The Sermon on the Mount is considered as the essence or core aspects of Jesus’ teachings and therefore important for every Christian. It occupies three chapters: chapters 5, 6, and 7 of Matthew’s gospel.

When a crowd of people have gathered around him, Jesus goes up to the top of a mountain and delivers his sermon. He begins with a series of blessings or ‘beatitudes’ and tells them that he has come not to destroy or overturn the laws from the Old Testament but to fulfil them. In the 6th chapter, Jesus focuses on dependence on God by way of prayer, telling his followers to pray in secret, for God will hear their prayers and reward them publicly. The Lord’s prayer is simply an example of humbly communicating with our Heavenly Father for our daily needs (provision), forgiveness, and strength in the face of temptation. Jesus turns from prayer to fasting, making a similar point. The next topic Jesus addresses is wealth, telling his followers not to accrue vast treasures in this life. In chapter 7 of Matthew gospel, Jesus instructs his followers, ‘Judge not, that ye be not judged’ and also to be careful of false prophets who will come in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.

Key points of the passage:

Matthew 6:14-15, “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”

The Hebrew word ‘Kaphar’ for forgiveness means pardon, to cover or atone for, to lift up. Repentance in the Hebrew sense always connoted not just acceptance and feelings of remorse but also changing behaviour, seeking pardon, and making amends. Atonement essentially means to "make right a wrong".

God made man that he might live for God’s glory and gave man a law to walk by; and if, when he does anything that tends not to glorify God, He deals with it as a debt with Divine Justice. So unforgiveness is also seen as a sin that God wants us to sort out, rather than ignore.

We have been pardoned of our sins in thought, word, and deed by the shedding of the blood of our Saviour Jesus Christ, therefore we have a responsibility. We do not have the luxury of holding on to our bitterness towards other people.

Jesus had much more to say about forgiveness (Matthew 9:2-6, 18:21-35, and Luke 17:3-4). Here, the emphasis is on the imperative / importance of forgiveness; on the fact that it is not an option.

There are 3 key passages, I want to draw your attention to:

• Matthew 9:2-6 (NIV) Paralysed man forgiven and healed & Luke 17:3-4: 2 Some men brought to him a paralyzed man, lying on a mat. When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the man, “Take heart, son; your sins are forgiven.” 3 At this, some of the teachers of the law said to themselves, “This fellow is blaspheming!” 4 Knowing their thoughts, Jesus said, “Why do you entertain evil thoughts in your hearts? 5 Which is easier: to say, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Get up and walk’? 6 But I want you to know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins.” So he said to the paralyzed man, “Get up, take your mat and go home.”

• John 8: 1-11 (NIV) Jesus forgives the woman caught in adultery. Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?” “No, Lord,” she said. And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.”

• Matthew 18:21-35 (NIV) The Parable of the Unmerciful Servant: 21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” 22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. 23 “Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. 24 As he began the settlement, a man who owed him 10,000 bags of gold was brought to him. 25 Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. 26 “At this the servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ 27 The servant’s master took pity on him, cancelled the debt, and let him go. 28 “But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a 100 silver coins. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded. 29 “His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.’ 30 “But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. 31 When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their master everything that had happened. 32 “Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I cancelled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33 Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ 34 In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. 35 “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”

Passages specifically referring to forgiveness:

Mark 11:25 (TLB) And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.

Colossians 3:13 (TLB) Be gentle and ready to forgive; never hold grudges. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.

1 John 1:9 (TLB) But if we confess our sins to Jesus, he can be depended on to forgive us and to cleanse us from every wrong. It is perfectly right for God to do this for us because Christ died to wash away our sins.

Isaiah 43:25 (TLB) I, yes, I alone am he who blots away your sins for my own sake and will never think of them again.

Acts 3:19 (NIV) Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.

Daniel 9:9 (NIV) The Lord our God is merciful and forgiving, even though we have rebelled against him.

Matthew 26:28 (NIV) This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.

Micah 7:13 (NIV) Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy.

Mark 2:10 (NIV) I want you to know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins.

As Christians, there are 3 key people involved in this equation: the offender, the victim/offended, and Jesus Christ.

According to God’s Word there are two types of forgiveness:

1. God's pardon of our sins. That is, God's promise not to count our sins against us, provided we are sorry for our wrongdoing. We cannot be proud, conceited, apathetic or ignore and turn a blind eye, when we sin and offend another person. It requires true repentance on our part (turning away from our old life of sin) and faith in Jesus Christ. God’s forgiveness says you are given another chance to make a new beginning.

2. Our obligation/duty to pardon others. This is so important that our eternal destiny depends on it.

There are also two scenarios to consider:

Scenario A: If the Offender has offended someone by his words or actions

In this case, if the Offender genuinely apologises for the wrong committed to the offended person and they forgive him/her, then it liberates him from guilt, shame, and condemnation; and this brings about hope, healing, peace, and God’s love into the lives of both parties involved.

Situation B: If someone has offended the Victim by their words or actions

In this case, the victim tends to hold onto grudges and justification to feel hurt. Even if the offender at times has no clue of what they have done wrong, the victim may go around with a chip on his/her shoulders, feeling sorry for themselves, upset, hurt, angry, resentful, and even feel like taking revenge.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean that what someone did to you was okay but that you’re releasing them from repaying you for the wrong (which they most likely cannot “repay” anyway). Releasing them frees you to release the hurt you have been carrying around and instead have peace and enjoy your life.

A well quoted saying goes like this – “Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.”

However, Jesus said if you want forgiveness, first you must give it. In the Kingdom of God, to receive God’s forgiveness, you must be willing to forgive others. That’s what Jesus said in Matthew 6:14-15.

Illustration of the consequences of unforgiveness: Over the many years of doing God’s work, I have seen lives radically changed by the love of God the Holy Spirit.

E.g. 1, a middle-aged lady who had suffered from years of domestic violence at the hands of an immoral husband, left Malaysia & migrated to NZ for a new start in life. But she found that she could not let go of the hurt and intense anger towards her husband. When I shared about the healing love of Jesus Christ, she cried, repented, and asked God to enter and change her life. Within minutes, God the Holy Spirit ministered to her directly and she as transformed. She started praising Jesus loudly, joyfully, and then burst into speaking in tongues. She went home praising God and saying she would call her husband and reconcile with him.

E.g. 2, A few years back, we were invited to peach at an AOG church in Dubai by a dear Pastor and his wife. After the service, his wife wanted me to pray for a lady who was bedridden and hence could not attend church. On speaking to the bedridden lady, I found that she was in that condition for years and that the best doctors in the land could not diagnose what was physiologically wrong with her. As I started to pray, God the Holy Spirit showed 3 women in this lady’s life who had ill-treated her and against whom she carried intense anger and revenge. The Holy Spirit simply said if this lady truly repented and forgave her offenders, then his love would bring healing in her life. And that Jesus Christ had already paid the price for her sins. But this lady held on to her pride, anger, and self-justification. At this point, the Pastor’s wife started speaking to this lady as she knew her family history and even knew the women she had quarrelled with! I do not know what the outcome was as we had to hurry to catch our flight; but the point here is our lives are transparent to God. So we need to set our house in order, that is set our lives in order quickly.

LIFE APPLICATION: Steps to forgiveness https://www.lifeway.com/en/articles/steps-to-forgiveness

Forgiveness does not come naturally. In fact, it is supernatural. It is God's way - His idea. This process consists of four simple stages. Let us all take some time to practise it now -

1. Hurt: Identify, experience, and express your feelings.

Label them as specifically as you can. Think back to what gave rise to these feelings.

• Who did this to you? When did it occur?

• Where did it happen?

2. Hate: If you have been hurt, you hate or dislike the person.

It is not wrong to hate; in fact, we are supposed to hate what God hates.

• Hate sin, not the sinner.

• Deal with the hate; if not persistent hatred often leads to feeling depressed or intense feeling of revenge, leading to wrong actions or consequences.

3. Hook: Acknowledge the deceptive feeling of control.

Refusing to forgive provides a feeling of power or control, but this feeling is deceptive as it is really a cover for your own sense of hurt and vulnerability.

• Refuse to be a victim. Cancel the debt.

• Move on with your life.

• Allow God to be the judge / justice maker.

Revenge feels good for a time; but ultimately, it does not work. The pain you give can never cancel the pain you have received. Get out of the way and let God take care of this.

4. Heal: Forgiveness is both an event and a process.

• Giving forgiveness to an offender is an event.

• Finding relief from your own pain is a process.

Remember, we are not doing it alone. God the Holy Spirit, the Counsellor and Comforter is there to bring about complete inner healing. It takes time. Forgiveness is the road to freedom and health. You may never like or trust this person, but the intensity of your hurt will diminish. One day you will find yourself praying for your offender. Soon you will realize you are free. But it makes little sense unless seen in the context of Christ's forgiveness toward you.

Ephesians 4:32 (NIV) Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Today Jesus our Loving Father invites us to forgive others. Amen.